Emotional Trauma

ISS Admin 2011-08-13 Comments
587

By : Pri16179

Hi, am Priyanka. I’m doing Mba in Bangalore this happened 1 year ago. It was a very bad experience for me. I was emotionally shattered. I went to a therapist for 4 months now. He said I should get it out from me and tell it to others to feel lighter and grow stronger. So here I am telling my story.

It started in 2010 Feb, when I started dating Vivek. He was my classmate. We had worked together on projects and assignments so we were close. He asked me out and I found him nice and fun so we used to go out. We gradually fell in love and were a couple. His parents stay in Andra, so he had an apartment for himself in Bangalore. We used to hang out there in free time with friends and watch cricket or movies.

One afternoon 4 of was at his apartment watching cricket. One of the guys had to go out with his girl friend. We were teasing him and he left. Other friend also had some work at his home and so he left. I didn’t have anything to do, so stay there watching the match. We started cuddling, he was holding me. He was taking pics of us. I was making funny faces and cute faces to the camera. Then we started kissing.

We already had sex once when we had gone to Goa for a trip with friends. It was only once. It was my first time. I was a lil drunk that time; I was not sure what I was doing. But it was fun. After that I was scared. And avoided being alone with him for long he was trying to kiss me on my neck and below. I was hesitant knowing where it would lead to eventually. He kept talking and reassuring. I gave up resisting and was getting horny.

He was taking pics of us kissing saying I was looking so cute and all. It was fun. Then he asked me to strip for him like a stripper. I thought it would be fun to do it. Was excited, so I got up from his lap and started to slowly play with my top and smiling at him and taking it off slowly while moving. I took off my jeans too slowly trying to show off and make it sexy. He loved it and was making a video on his phone.

He wanted me to take off my bra too. I was feeling a lil uneasy but since i’d done so much and he was enjoying it, I decided to do it. He grabbed me and pulled me back to the couch and started kissing me. My lips neck and breasts he kept his phone on the coffee table in front. I was freaking out about the video. He said it’d be fun to make a video of us having sex. We could watch it later and it’d be great to watch ourselves doing it. I thought it’d be interesting and liked the idea.

He got naked and wore a condom and wanted me to get on top of him and ride him. I got on top of him and got his cock slowly inside me, it was still a shock. Waited a few seconds and started riding him. It was too good. We did it for like 10 min. We both climaxed and were really tired. We were just lying on the sofa kissing softly for sometime.

He asked me for a blowjob. I hated that. It seemed disgusting to put it in my mouth. I flatly said no. He was begging me. I said I could never do that. It was starting to get late so i thought of leaving. I was getting ready, he was watching our video. I told him to keep it safe or else somebody could see it. He said he’ll hide it and we’d watch sometime together and then delete it.

I went back to hostel. A few days later he’d got a DVD of inception movie, we’d planned to watch at his apartment in the afternoon after coll. We went to his apartment and vikrant also came. Vikrant was teasing us. He was asking what we did last week all alone while watching cricket. I was feeling embarrassed and said we did nothing. He was still teasing us and said he’d seen something. I was shocked and a little scared

Vivek was just sitting without saying anything. Vicky said he’s seen the video in Vivek’s phone. I was mad at Vivek and was feeling horrible. I started shouting at him, he said he’d hidden it, but it was still there in the video player. And vikrant had opened it accidentally and seen it.  I was starting to feel really sick. I never liked vikrant. He started asking why I didn’t want to give my boyfriend a blow job! I was so angry I could hit him.

Vivek was just laughing and telling him not to tease me. I started getting scared and told Vivek to delete all the photos and videos. He said he’d delete, but then vikrant said I should give Vivek a blowjob and only then he’d delete. I slapped him and started shouting at Vivek to delete them.

Both of them were laughing! Vivek said that’s a nice idea. He always wanted a blowjob right from goa and I’d never done it. He asked me to do it once and he’d delete it.

I was looking at him shocked thinking he must be joking. I said no and told him to delete that right now. He asked what I would do otherwise. I didn’t know what to say, I said I’d complain to police. They were both laughing. I couldn’t understand whether they were blackmailing me or just making fun.  I hoped it was just a joke he said either give me a blowjob and I will delete it, or else go back and I will upload it to internet. Anyways you have smiled and talked in the video, so no one can say i forced you to do it.

I was getting really scared now and started begging him not to do anything and just let me go. He said I had 1 min to decide my future. Vikrant set his timer on his watch too and started smiling. I was going crazy, I wanted to run away. I begged him to delete it. Both were simply looking at me. Time was up and watch started beeping. He said he’d upload and connected his laptop. I was begging him not to do anything. He opened some porn site. I got really scared and said i’d give him the blowjob.

He asked if i was sure, I said yes only once and then you have to delete everything and never talk to me again. He agreed. I said i’ll come in the evening and give him a blowjob when nobody would be there. I felt too embarrassed to do it then itself. He said if I went out of the house he’d upload it, I was free to go and he wouldn’t stop me. I got really irritated and said fine lets go to your bedroom.

Vikrant said do it here only in the hall, I too want to watch. I and vivek were shocked! Vikrant said I have already seen your video having sex so whats there in this. Vivek said ok. I was in a shock. I refused to do it. They said they had no problem if I didn’t want to do it, they’d just upload. I was torn. There was no escape. He sat on the couch and pulled off his pants and boxers and asked me to kneel in front of him. I was almost in tears and kneeled down. He asked me to suck.

I just wanted to finish it off as quickly as possible and get out. I held his cock and put the tip in my mouth. I felt really disgusting and felt i’d vomit. He was smiling and asked me to lick his cock properly first to get it hard.  Vikrant told Vivek to make me take off my top. I begged him not to do it. I didn’t want to cry and look weak, I was controlling it. Vivek said he has already seen everything so nothing will happen if I take it off. I took it off.

He then asked me to take off my bra too, I knew what’d happen if I refused, so I took it off and kneeled down wearing only my jeans. The only thing in my mind was to finish it off and get out as fast as possible. Vikrant was smiling at me. I closed my eyes and started sucking his cock. After a few seconds Vivek held my hair and pulled me back and stopped me. I was surprised, he said he wanted it slow and he’d pause when he was about to cum.

By this time, vikrant had pulled down his jeans and was masturbating, I felt really sick. I was feeling like a prostitute. I closed my eyes and started sucking him again and told him not to cum in my mouth at least, I found semen in my mouth very disgusting. He said ok. He was squeezing my breasts and waist and shoulders. I was not sure if it was vivek or Vikrant I was too scared to open my eyes and continued sucking.

After a few minutes he pulled my hair back sharply and got up. I looked up and he started ejaculating on my face on my eyes, cheeks and neck. Vikrant too was standing and masturbating beside us. He too ejaculated on me, on my face and breasts. They both sat back on sofa smiling and said you only didn’t want it inside the mouth so it’s your fault. I felt too humiliated and rushed to the bathroom.  When I came back they were still sitting on the couch holding the phone.

He showed me the phone and marked them all and deleted. I was feeling weak and faint. I left his apartment immediately without saying a word and got into an auto and went back to hostel. I didn’t go to college for 2 weeks, my parents got to know I wasn’t attending coll and came to meet me. I was depressed, but I couldn’t tell them the reason. They got me to meet a therapist and talk.

He treated me well and talked slowly for a long time. I met him twice a week and he helped me. After 4 months now, he said I was in resolution and I should tell my story to others to get out of pain otherwise I’m completely fine. So I wrote this down. I didn’t know whom to tell all this, thought posting it anonymous on net would be better. I didn’t have the courage to post it till now. Some how posting it today.

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